Ner ner ner ner ner we've got your runway

Gordon Brown may be feeling like the cat that got the cream, but you and I know that his runway won't get off the ground. Like thousands of people, I've signed up to be a beneficial owner of Greenpeace's scrap of land in Sipson. They emailed me today, asking if I'do tell Gordon that he's not getting his hands on our land.

It sounded like a good idea, so I popped over to their website and fired off a missive. Why not do the same yourself? You can sign up to own the land while you're at it. If you need some inspiration, here's what I sent our glorious leader.

Dear Prime Minister,

Like thousands of other people who care more for the environment than 'saving the world', I've got my hands on a bit of your runway. And like them, I'm not going to give it back.

I would make an eloquent point about how your proposed emissions caps aren't legally binding, or how small increases in efficiency would be wiped out by the increase in flights. But I won't.

Instead, why not take a minute to imagine me sitting here, waggling my fingers and blowing a raspberry at you. Because you're not going to get your runway built, and you're not going to get to look Churchillian.

Sorry about that.

Lots of love,

Richard (part-owner of four blades of grass under your runway)